Four years ago, in march, I went to Rome for the first time in eleven years. It was a birthday present from myself for myself. Oh, and how I longed for it! The first time I was there was, as I said, eleven years before. Since then, every single day for eleven years, I wanted to go back. I read a lot about Rome, mostly the ancient part of the city, and I dreamed about it every day.
Not one day passed when i didn´t think about my great love, my heart, my city…my Rome. Everybody who has ever been there probably love the city, but my affection is quite different. At least I think so. This is on a totally different level.
Sometimes you can just feel IT… you know, that feeling crawling up inside of you. It starts in your heart, crawls up your throat, to your eyes and they get all moist, down to the legs so they get all tingly and start to shake, and on to your stomach to settle. THAT feeling.
I have many of these feelings from this place, and it´s probably not possible to tell them all right now. I´m only going to mention two.
The second night in Rome, la prima volta 2009. It´s night. I get up to Gianicolo, mostly to take a look at the monument to Giuseppe Garibaldi, and the words inscribed on it; Roma o morte. There´s always a lot of people up here; couples in love, families, young people partying… I leave Garibaldi for the moment and turn around. I knew the view from up here would be stunning. I get to the edge, to the wall. Every single person up here just disappears. They don´t exist. The only thing for my eyes is the city, spreading out in front of me. All of her lights smiles at me, her warmth embraces me, and it feels like I´m floating a bit above the ground.
The second day in Rom, la terza volta 2009. I´m in Rome with my brother and his family. We´re walking along the Via dei Fori Imperiali. It´s sunday, and the whole street is closed of to traffic and you can go wherever and however you want. I, as the privat tourguide of the group, babbles on about the imperial fora, Trajan´s markets and so on. We come from Piazza Venezia, and has just passed this wedding cake looking building, and Trajan´s markets and forum. Just before we get to the edge of the Forum of Caesar I look up to where Auguraculum once were. That feeling comes over me again and I loose my concentration. Completely. It sort of lifts me up a bit, and I was afraid to walk on. It´s like this feeling is trying to tell me something, like there´s something really really important below the streets pavement.
I know, this sounds really strange, and I don´t disagree with that. But this is the way the city makes me feel. Like my own personal brand of heroine.